Ripped from the headlines. Of BlogHer. Friday post. Brain tired now.

I am a Clothes Horse. A big bodacious derby racing clothes horse.

In Canada, there is not as much in the stores as there is in the US. I know this is partially because of sheer population, us being 1/10 of the US, but it makes for some bad selection. My inner (and outer) fashionista weeps when I walk into a Macys or Nordstrom’s or Layne Bryant. Plus sized American ladies, no more complaining until you have to come and shop in a smaller country. You can complain that sometimes, the exact same sweater in a “regular” size, often costs 5% more in a plus size.
My best bet in town, and in most of Canada, is Canada’s only Department store (that is now mostly American owned, don’t tell) – The Bay (no online shopping) I have been buying most of my “locally purchased” clothing here. They carry most of the major brands that make plus sized stuff – Tommy Hilfiger, Jones New York, Nygård, I.N.C., Style and Co, and other store brands than are more inexpensive. I tend to go for the higher end brands there, and wait for sales, they have great sales, they just arrive later than in American Department Stores.
There are other boutique-ish chain stores. Casual, comfortable and affordable, there is Cotton Ginny cottonginny.ca (also no online shopping), When I had a “real” job in an office, I bought a lot of work clothing at, Laura (again, no online shopping) they do petites, plus and regular. They do have some casual stuff, and a more mature customer base. There is also Addition-Elle, which is probably the most popular plus size chain, since we lost Antels a number of years go. You can find them at ddition-elle.com, but again, no online shopping. I worked there for a while; they carry a varied price point and style of clothing. They still carry, dressy, casual, special occasion, but have stopped carrying other brands (Jones, Elisabeth from Liz Claiborne, etc) and are manufacturing items using their own brand, which are just not as nice as the bands they mimic. They do carry swimwear, workout, and lingerie, which is a godsend here. They are similar to Lane Bryant, but not as trendy or robust a selection. Eddie Bauer used to go to a size 20 here, but now it is stopped it’s sizing at an 18 and the only way to get plus- sizes is online
There are some other plus sizes stores to shop, I admit I do not frequent all that often. Reitmans, they claim to be Canada’s largest women’s specialty retailer, founded in 1926. Who knew? As I read more, I see they own Addition-Elle, < a href="http://www.penningtons.com/">Penningtons, and other women’s clothing stores that sell non-plus sizes. Wow. Oh and they are also owned by Rogers Giant Corporate Conglomerate. I had no idea! I can buy underwear AND a cell phone from them!
Essentially, I subscribe to the get what you paid for philosophy. Susan Wagner has a post on WHAT to wear when you are in plus sized fashions. Go read her!!! Come back on Sunday for part 2 of Where to shop when you are plus sized – ONLINE EDITION.

Skull pajamas pants are the new black.

I realized you probably have to write more for people to comment. I have been having trouble getting to the decent writing part as of late. Check out the reason below. I do comment on other people’s sites though, quite regularly. At least I FEEL as though I do.
I read through schmutzie’s comment on the great mofo delurk and never realized how important it is for people to have their comment acknowledged. I so suck at that. I often reply directly to the person, but not very often in the comment stream.
Go check out what all the talk is about at schmutzie’s place. I am going to make for of an effort not to just comment, but to respond. Check out this awesome comment by Schmutzie’s husband:

Conversation and comments are the real currency of blogland. Every blogger feels it, some mention it, but only Schmutzie goes out of her way to create buttons and build some entertainment into the request. If I were having this conversation at work, I’d be using terms like ‘value added’, but I’m at home, so I’ll just say it’s awesome.

– palinode
I seriously, could not have said it better. The best thing about having a blog for me is the community and discussion. I have lucky to meet other people on and off line and maintain friendships and go to blogher, but creating a dialog on a specific post is why I started doing this to being with. Writing without feedback is like making loooooove, out of nothing at allll…. maaaaaaaaaking love shouting into a void.

I find it hard to post when my mind is preoccupied with one or two other things. In this case, I have been really preoccupied with some horrible anxiety and some sad. I will shake it. One day when the planets are aligned and the moon is in the seventh sign we will hit on the right combination of medication, diet, exercise, herbal tinctures, meditation, acupuncture, massage, sweat lodges, and leaches, and THEN I will really kick it. Anyhow, that is how it feels right now. It also feels like I talk about this too much. I missed a non medical appointment because I had taken a sedative and had to scurry around the topic making sure I didn’t give all my crazy up. I don’t want to talk about it with my mom. My psychiatrist gets back from being away for 10 days next week (she has no back up). I hate belabouring my friends with my weirdness. I am 37 for the love of god, no one told me when I had my first panic attack at 12, it would go one this long. I almost wish I knew then how long this would go on. Answer = endlessly.
Mark and I, 5 years ago, almost to the day. Time passes, I don’t find it flies.

Sure, for most of us Talk Like a Pirate Day, is just once a year. For one American high school, it never ends.

The Butte County Pirates Football Team

I would NOT want to play wide receiver or tight-end for that football team. Thank you thank you, I am eleven years old.
Thanks Michelle, my excellent, yet blogless friend!
* Hai: a shark. “Zu den Haien schicken” means to send someone to the sharks.
http://www.talklikeapirate.com/howtogerman.html

Did a wacky stream of consciousness posts on last night’s Emmys on

Alpha+mom. Upon a second, third, and fourth look, it needed some editing. I think I assumed y’all could read my mind. Read the whole thing here.
I will taunt you with what to expect!
Best Supporting Actor Comedy. KEVIN DILLON HUG IT OUT! Oooo Jeremy Piven wins! Rainn Wilson is pretty funny. I am satisfied with Piven winning, but would have preferred Dillon this year. Was Piven just sexing someone or did he just not comb his hair?
Vanessa Williams: F for Feathers and Failure.
Best supporting actor drama. I predict the gay mafia will make T.R. Knight win, but I love me some Masi Oka. Oh Shatner, you have redeemed yourself in so many ways since Star Trek. Terry O’Quinn might change my mind about tuxes, that is a great pink shirt, you creepy LOST weirdo character. Fab speech tho.

Totally looking forward to the Golden Globes, even though I have seen no movies in a theatre in the last year.
mwuah mwuah! xxxooo

Cross posted from blogher.org. Looking Good Naked.
snip——–>
So, I am innocently watching television as I am apt to do once in a while, ok, all the time, and I see the most amazing preview! I was watching a Friends re-run (where Rachel’s dog Le Poo dies) and I see a preview for a show called “How to Look Good Naked”. Not how to lose weight, how to diet yourself gorgeous, fat camp, how to manage a gastric bypass, but how. To. Look. Good. Naked. I immediately went to the W Network Canada’s website to see what was up with this show.

Learn to LOVE the way you look! Each episode puts one woman and her body-issue under the microscope. Instead of plastic surgery or fad-dieting options, our leading celebrity stylist gets to the core of her negative body-image by debunking the myth of perfection. With secrets from the world of fashion and beauty, his aim is to arm her with the confidence to show it off – both fully clothed and completely naked. A provocative anti-plastic surgery series for women, of every shape and size, which is truly revealing!

Loving how I look now? I found tears in my eyes. I myself had become caught up in a current body hatred cycle, and trying to diet and exercise myself out of the despair. I am not discounting losing weight for health, I am diabetic and that is a huge reason I want to be healthy.
I started to remember some sage words from one therapist or another from over the years. You must love yourself NOW, love your size NOW, your love handles, your bra size, your tummy, your thighs, your butt, every piece. You cannot do something good for a body you hate. You cannot treat something you hate with kindness, gentleness, and goodness. She told me it would be difficult to give nutritious food to a body I hated. It would be almost impossible to keep to an exercise regime, improving a body you hate. At the time it was in one ear and out the other, like so many things you are not ready to hear.
The host of the British How to Look Good Naked, is a man. This initially shocked me. In this one hour show, hundreds of women were willing to get naked for him to prove that breast firming gels did not work. His name is Gok Wan. He is a Stylist, not a psychologist or any other professional designation that you would assume someone who makes women loves themselves would have. His book How to Look Good Naked is published by Harper Collins. I could not find it on Amazon.com, but found it on Amazon UK. I ordered it immediately from Chapters.com, an online Canadian bookseller.

I am struggling with words to describe Gok. He is amazing. I felt comfortable with him right away through the TV! He casually talks about boobs and tummies and how great your ass is, like he is talking about making a risotto. He is matter of fact about it, which I think is what makes him sound (and I believe is) so sincere. In talking to participant Vikki, he says her tits are fabulous and she should flaunt her cleavage and not hide it under gigantic shirts that give her no shape and make her look like a frump who has given up. “Love the cleave!” her tells her. I laugh, and look at my own gigantic cleave. Perhaps I can get closer, in a more personal fashion, to my own big cleavage. Maybe, just maybe, even love it.

Friends,
If you think I would be good at writing a blog and have the following abilities,

Fell asleep on the couch, whilst petting the kitty.awww.
Had a dream I was acting in a movie that took place on a Princess Cruise. I accidentally walked there from Caesar’s Palace in Las Vegas. Shut up. It was all retro and 80’s looking, with the hair and swuinsuits and whatnot. I acs more or less thin since it was the 80’s, and had on a lovely yellow one piece bathing suit. WITH ME was Courtney Cox, who I was explaining would be really famous for a show called Friends, she said it sounded dumb. I also spoke with Julliana Marguillles telling her I was a huge fan! She was all confused, so I had to tell her about ER, but since leaving ER, I couldn’t even bring up Snakes on a Plane. There was also Amy Brenneman, I told her she would also have successes and I was sorry that Judging Amy was cancelled, but it was kind of lame. Dude, it was on from 88-’05!
Then, all of a sudden, everything got over exposed and green and weird. So I woke up. C’est fini.
Now I am not tired for bed, and I am craving pepperoni. ARGH!

Open up a new entry, put that post in a list, publish that list for all to read.
I am obsessed (still) with a Dick in a Box. It already an Emmy! Mark told me so, I am not sure what category. Perhaps, best visual short film music video aboutdicks?
Anyhow. I am hoping that my post in a list will alleviate a bi of agitation i have right now. Too much swimming around in my head. You know? I suspect this will be random.

Remember, talk like a pirate Day is September 19. Shiver me timbers!
That is all I can think of right now.
xoxo
p.s. some new photos on flickr

Twitter, where are you? I am getting the shakes. I need a 12 step program.
Charlotte is sick, My head hurts, BioMom™ is gone, so I have to tend to my child, cook and clean.
Sick child is calling for me. Tired.